"I like my beaches and my cars…topless! We began our day in the beautiful Turks and Caicos with a lovely swim followed by me cooking eggs à la Francaise for the girls. It doesn’t get much better than this in my opinion, so when the girls started this glorious day arguing about whether or not Sonja self-medicates, I wanted everyone to chill out and enjoy their breakfast. Before we left on this trip, I told the girls at the Italian restaurant that this is a vacation, not an intervention, but I guess some of the girls can’t resist scrutinizing each other. I’m more of a “live and let live” kinda girl.
After breakfast on the beach, even though I was very relaxed, I decided a little yoga taught by a cute instructor would do no harm. As we were getting into our groove on the mats, our peace was disturbed by an animated conversation between Sonja and Dorinda where Dorinda convinced Sonja to just “shut it down” when the girls give her unsolicited advice. Shortly thereafter, we see Sonja poolside barraging the girls with angry denials. I don’t think this vacation and this peaceful morning in particular was the right place or time to discuss Sonja’s issues (it never is), and as you can see, even when we agreed to put the subject to bed, a $100 fine per mention didn’t deter them from the subject!
Since Sonja planned this trip for us, I felt bad when she decided to skip the boat ride. I can see why she chose to take a little break, but I missed her and told her so in a text. On the boat, Ramona was really laying on the charm, as she always does when she’s been a bad girl, so when she jumped in my lap to hug it out, I decided she deserved a good spanking! We were having a lot of fun, so when we concocted our plan to douse Ramona with ice and were able to launch the entire bucket over her blonde head, it was the ice-ing on the cake!
Going out at night in the Turks and Cock-ohs…hah…loved that line..is so much fun but we couldn’t get from the cars to the door without a fight! Dorinda isn’t used to hanging out with eight girls, and she was feeling exhausted, so when Heather yelled at her for walking ahead, Dorinda’s reaction was uncharacteristically dramatic. She’s learning that a Housewives’ trip requires physical and emotional endurance, and I’ve learned to take naps when I start feeling tired, but I’m not as good at it.
Ramona has really become a much more humble and kind person since she and Mario split. I feel for her, because divorce is like losing a limb, but I hate to say it: divorce suits her. Relationships evolve over time, and sometimes love isn’t enough. Ramona was correct when she said men need to feel important and she realizes that maybe her strong personality was too much for Mario. I think the right man will love her for who she is, Ramotions and all.
I love to swim naked and my viewpoint is more European than American when it comes to bathing au naturel. There is something so freeing and primal about skinny dipping! After my swim, I went up to the house where Bethenny was relaxing and fixing us a salad. When the girls decided to lunch elsewhere, I could see why Bethenny decided to stand firm with her veggies and her plans. There is a lot of manic energy on these trips, and like me, Bethenny realizes it’s important to take a breather now and again.
Until next week when we join you from the Turks and Caicos…don’t be uncool! My new dance single, “Girl Code (Don’t be Uncool)” will available soon, so stay tuned to @CountessLuann at Twitter and Instagram."
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