Recap: Vanderpump Rules Season 2 - Episode 9: Rich People Annoy Me

This week we are in for a special treat! The ladies of RHOBH had a dinner party, Kyle, Kim and Carlton were not there but the SUR crew severed the ladies and needless to say it made for possibly the best episode of #PumpRules EVER!

Tom is joking around with Ariana. If looks killed kill, Stassi is staring daggers at Ariana. Why is everyone up in arms about a platonic relationship? Here she is Queen Lisa. Those shoes are EVERYTHING Lisa. Lisa tells everyone she wants her dinner party to be fabulous, I wouldn't expect anything less. Tom has issues with Jax spreading rumors about him, and Ariana. Umm yes!! Dude Jax do you not have anything better to do than interfere in your 'friends' lives? It's so high school and it makes you look like an attention starved lunatic. Sooo Lisa is putting together the team Katie, and Stassi are the servers and Ariana, Tom, and Jax will be working the bar. Ariana says 'Lisa has put together a great team, well except for Jax.' Hell we all know his bartending skills suck! Jalapeno Margarita anyone?

Stassi and Katie are talking about being the 'A Team' because they get to serve 'high society' the only reason you get to do it Stassi is because Brandi doesn't know how to get over the past, if she acted like a grown up Scheana would be serving. Tom is confronting Jax about him saying he saw Tom and Ariana grinding on each other. Jax is acting like the victim by saying that Stassi and Katie have it out for him. Quit acting like a bitch and man up, that's coming from a gay guy. Back to Stassi and Katie who were obviously told by Jax he saw Tom and Ariana together. Jax do you realize it seems each week you dig yourself deeper, and deeper? It's all because you are incapable of being honest. Jax is playing both sides Tom! I'm glad you see it.

Kristen shows up with Stassi and Katie saying she checked Tom's call log and that there were calls from Ariana. Kristen if the trust is broken in the relationship than you have bigger problems to talk about than worrying about what you 'believe he is doing' with Ariana. OMG she took a screen shot from his phone and sent it to her phone. Seriously Kristen? You say this is stuff he shouldn't be doing, so he's not allowed to be friends with someone? That's controlling and will drive him away faster than if you were caught cheating probably. Katie makes more sense than I expect and it is refreshing 'If you have to check the phone records every couple of days the relationship is broken.' Truth Gurrl! Kudos. Back at SUR, Jax is denying he said anything in front of Katie and Tom. Plus I'm living for the side commentary from Scheana and Ariana. Katie straight up says you told me this, and now you're making me like an asshole.

Kristen goes up to Tom saying “why'd you call Ariana?” Tom stand your ground and say 'because I'm a person who is allowed to have friends' he asks her if there is alcohol is in it. She replies obviously. Duh liquid courage! Thank you Tom, I'm glad you told her off because really who gives a f**k if you talked to Ariana? Scheana is going to the studio, OMG that outfit Scheana! Its bad ass! Those pump/sneakers with bling, killed it honey BTW that was such a great idea to go the Kesha route. Good as Gold is on my playlist right now LOL. Back to SUR, Lisa is making sure everything is good for her dinner party because she needs to smooth over a situation with Brandi and Joyce. We all know that situation will not get fixed soon.

At Stassi's apartment and Katie is getting ready to read Kristen's cards. This should be interesting. I want Katie to do my cards. I'll pay Katie! Stassi drops a bombshell saying Scheana told her 'well I don't know what happened three years ago in Vegas.' Obviously if something happened Stassi, Scheana would know. Stassi also says she is going to seduce Jax in Cabo to get the TRUTH. At this point Jax will say anything for a piece of that ass Stassi.

Tom and Jax are getting ready for the dinner party. Ariana is there too. Hahaha she says technically her and Tom should be pissed at Jax, but it's hard to be because Jax is a joke. Too true, honey, too true. Cut to Katie reading more cards for Kristen. Katie tells Kristen that coming up she's going to feel a lot of pain. Kristen feels like the cards are making her confront things she really doesn't want to. Confront them on your own, don't let cards read by Katie determine how you feel about a situation, control your own fate. Stassi says 'Kristen could literally find Tom with his penis in another girl’s vagina and say we are on the same mobile plan so we can't break up.' Stassi I feel that, she makes excuses because she loves Tom but when is enough, enough? Once you’re cheated on the trust is gone. Kristen, honey that should tell you, driving yourself crazy over it just makes it way harder, and way worse.

Time for the dinner party yes!! Lisa says she doesn't want Scheana because of the Brandi situation. A bitch that can't get over the past is just that a bitch, and she's jealous. Kristen is her own situation! Yes Lisa she is a hot mess, cray cray honey. So the women from BH are showing up. Scheana says Brandi needs to move on, yes please. Kristen is sitting outside SUR crying, Peter is checking on her. All over these rumors that mean nothing. Peter tells Lisa that Kristen is distraught, Lisa says these days when isn't she. I see the trail of tears leading back into the SUR lounge now. Lisa is worried Kristen is going to come over and confront Ariana during the dinner party.

Brandi, Yolanda, and Joyce are ordering, why make it so f**king difficult? I mean why switch mozzarella with arugula? Is mozzarella that bad, or do you think your hot shit because you're making money? Stassi says she's going to kill some rich bitches and then steal their handbags. Send me Yolanda's, Stassi!! Brandi and Joyce are getting into it. Stassi has a spot on impression of Joyce's husband hahaha. All the servers are standing around watching the fight, and Lisa is like 'This is not what you're getting paid for' So Stassi is at the door like 'no way I’m missing this, this is some good shit.' Stassi says she needs tips for the next time she gets in a fight. I am laughing so hard right now. OMG LMAO then Tom says 'you wouldn't know these people are mad because there faces don't move.' DEAD!!

The dinner party has been so much better from the server's side. Bahahaha 'Someone's racist, someone's Cuban..'-  Stassi 'And someone's black apparently'- Katie. The fight is utterly ridiculous but the commentary. Bravo! They are happy they got all the orders right, but of course Brandi who had the most difficult order is nibbling a French fry. I guess being constantly called a racist and trash can ruin your appetite. Jax thinks LaToya Jackson is fighting with Brandi. Really Jax? Everyone else looks puzzled when he says this because they are smarter than the average bear and knows Joyce looks nothing like LaToya Jackson. OMG he's telling Kristen, Ariana is bartending because no one told Kristen, they knew better. Jax please get some common sense. Kristen takes off, Stassi is guarding the door so she can't make a scene. Introducing SUR's newest bouncer… Stassi Schroeder! So someone goes and gets Tom to talk to Kristen outside.

Kristen starts in about what horrible day she’s had, and how no one told her that Ariana was bartending boo fucking who! Tom says his day hasn't been good either, but of course Kristen only cares about how she's feeling. She goes on to say she knows that Ariana and Tom were together because Stassi told her that Scheana said she doesn't know about Vegas. Oh shit Tom goes and grabs Scheana saying what did you say to Kristen. WTF since how does this get put on Scheana?? Scheana says I don't know if something happened, or did it? She says to Tom. Hahaha. Of course Tom says no.

Lisa comes out, I feel for your Lisa. Always drama, but you are very nice because I see the heartbreak in Kristen's eyes too. You gave the best advice you could Lisa. Lisa has so much on her plate don't know how she does it. Ariana is now being told by Scheana that she was just attacked. Ariana says 'you're my best friend if something happened in Vegas you would know.' Ariana says it’s such bullshit, well yes it is girl, being attacked for next to no reason is total BS.

Ariana and Scheana decided to go outside and talk to Kristen. Ohh, but wait Ariana you now have Stassi and Katie to contend with as well. As soon as Ariana walks out Kristen says seriously. So Kristen is pissed that Scheana came out with Ariana. Umm it's Okay for your two friends to put in their two cents. That's just wrong, melodramatic, and crazy tonight. You should win an award or SOMETHING. Stassi says if it was her she would want to be apologetic constantly. I know for a fact Ariana was going to say, 'I agree 100% and have felt that way forever' Ariana told me, but she never gets it out because Katie and Kristen start yelling at Scheana. These bitches here, how would you like it if you were attacked for being a friend? I don't think you'd have the witty comebacks Scheana has.

Ariana tells Kristen all that happened in Vegas was poker. She also says that what ever Tom does is on him and not her BOOM! Speak it sister. Loved this episode! Until next week, you residential #PumpRules officiano :-)

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Vanderpump Rules airs Monday nights at 9/8c only on Bravo

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