Jacqueline writes:
"Episode 5! Moving along!Right now you all are witnessing the birth of The Little Kernel! It's looking good, isn't it? BLK Beverages is finally well on its way selling nationally and internationally now in many countries, but it took years to build up and expand the company and make a big enough income to replace the one my husband once had with his old company. Meanwhile, we had a child diagnosed with autism as well as other unexpected expenses, and we had a lot to maintain. The difference in income took a few years to catch up to us. The last couple of years were very difficult to juggle everything. We cut back where we could. We have some catching up to do, but we never gave up. We have been working hard, and we are well on our way. The future is looking bright! What I love most about The Little Kernel is their desire to give back to help others in need. Clearly the company has just launched and is already making a difference in people's lives. Go check them out on their website www.TheLittleKernel.com and follow them on social media @TheLittleKernel. You will become obsessed! We thank you for your continued support!
I know Joe Gorga wasn't being malicious when he said he felt bad that my child isn't healthy like their kids, but I do want him and others to know that just because my child has autism, it doesn't mean he isn't healthy. Yes, some people with Autism have challenging behaviors and medical problems, but please don't discount the many wonderful things they offer and contribute to this world. Nicholas brings us so much joy and love to our lives. He's extremely intelligent. Even with the challenges, he makes us smile every day. We don't want people to pity our family or our child. We just want acceptance. The key to autism acceptance is education and understanding. For those who don't know, autism is a developmental, neurobiological disorder that appears within the first three years of life. It affects the brain’s normal development of social and communication skills, which affects a child’s ability to interact, communicate, relate, play, imagine, and learn. They also could exhibit some self stimulatory and repetitive behaviors as well. They are always capable of learning, and they do love.
I was excited about having Teresa and Joe over for dinner. I wanted us all to enjoy each other and have a good time like the good old days. I was hopeful we were on the right track to repairing the friendships we all had with each other. I couldn't wait for them to see how much my kids have grown. Teresa hasn't really been around Nick since his diagnosis four years ago. It made me feel good that Teresa was so great with my kids. I was proud to show them off. The night was off to a good start. I wanted to keep this night light and fun! I wanted to start creating new positive memories.
As soon as the guys (our comic relief) separated from us, the tension between Teresa and I began. I really wish you all could have seen everything that was said, but you can't squeeze everything into one episode. I felt that Teresa had started poking at me right away. It was her typical blame shift game with a few jabs here and there. Teresa kept bringing up the past and how she felt she was wronged by everyone, but she conveniently forgot and took no accountability for what she has done to others. I remember one of the things she was bringing up was what Melissa "did to her" while I defended Melissa and reminded Teresa of things she did to Melissa. I quickly became annoyed by Teresa's lack of accountability, and I became agitated. I think you could see that in my face and hear it in my voice.
Teresa may have been on her own island at one time, but I believe she put herself on that island. Nobody intentionally ganged up on her. We each had our own separate issues with Teresa and one had nothing to do with another's, although there were some undeniable similarities we all experienced with Teresa's behavior.
On the night of my deck convo with Teresa, I honestly had no idea Caroline was coming over. Teresa and I had been on the deck talking for four hours prior to Caroline coming over! I had not planned AT ALL for her to come over! I feel like Teresa should have known that. I'm a one-on-one kind of girl! Everybody knows that's how I roll. I don't need back up. I can hold my own.
Somebody play back the tape! Don't get it twisted! Teresa is the one who first brought up her brother, although I DID notice the spin she tried to put on it. It bothered me because Teresa knew I was currently good friends with her brother, just as I was two years ago, so I couldn't figure out WHY she was trying to cause a problem between him and I by saying that her brother told her not to trust me 2 years ago! Especially when, according to Joe, he didn't say what Teresa claimed he did. That was clearly Teresa's interpretation of what he said. It was a red flag to me when Teresa said that at the time, because it was supposedly during the same time frame where her brother was telling me that Teresa wasn't really my friend because she really had never forgiven me for the night on my deck. In retrospect, I did and still DO believe that to be true.
I decided to call Joe Gorga on the spot, because I wasn't willing to play the "he said, she said" game. I felt that Joe and I were close enough as friends that I could call him directly, as I have in the past. I spontaneously decided to go straight to the source. I believed this was the only way the truth would come out and it wouldn't continue to get twisted through the grapevine later on. If Joe Gorga had in fact said that about me to Teresa two years ago while Joe and I were supposedly friends, I felt I needed to reevaluate my friendship with him. I'm glad he cleared that up.
As for Teresa and her brother, it's no secret that they did not have a great relationship two years ago. It shouldn't matter what each said about the other two years ago while they were at war. The point is that they are good now. Nothing surfacing from the past should ever be an issue between them now. They started over with a clean slate and a fresh start. I didn't even consider in that moment that it could be an issue now. And look... It wasn't! Joe and Teresa both confirmed everything was fine! I am sincerely happy things are good with them now. I hope it stays that way.
By now our jabs were going back and forth. Back during the tabloid drama, Teresa told me she was getting paid to put out articles. Good for her for making some extra money. I didn't care about that. I only cared when she was throwing the rest of us under the bus in those articles and in her books while she was doing it.
I did, however, care to know if the stories in the tabloids were true or not about my friend. I worry about my friends because I care about them. I never knew which stories were the ones Teresa put out or even which ones were true or not, because Teresa wouldn't talk about it. How would she expect me to know what's real or not, or expect me not to worry about my friend and not wonder why my friend would open up to the tabloids, but not to me? You all know that if you saw a crazy tabloid heading about your friend, you would ask them about it. It's common sense and human nature. Let's be real!
Teresa trying to bring up my husband's legal issues involving his old company that was forced into a corporate bankruptcy in comparison to her and Joe's criminal case was totally ludicrous to me. She's always trying to shift the spotlight on to someone else. There's absolutely no comparison! One does not remotely compare to the other. I had always talked openly about my husband's company bankruptcy. Go back and watch Season 4 reunion to see where I brought it up and talked openly about it! There was no reason for Teresa to ask me questions about it, because I told her and everybody else I knew everything I knew about it. The point that I was trying to make by saying that Chris and I didn't file a personal fraudulent bankruptcy -- besides that being true -- was the difference that I had to find out about Teresa's legal issues and the possibility of her going to jail through a tabloid...that she may or may not have put out herself! Had I put my business in the media and it was as bad as hers and I had never said anything to her, I'm sure she would have asked me about it! If not, I would have felt insulted.
How was I to know that out of all the crazy articles Teresa admittedly put out herself, that ONE particular tabloid story wasn't one of hers? I'm not supposed to worry if it's true or ask questions? Ever? That's just bizarre.
Then Teresa hit me with a real "LOW BLOW" by saying that her "REAL" friends knew what was going on and knew not to ask her anything about it, because they all knew it wasn't true, and I should have just known that it wasn't true also! Wait, what?! Clearly....it was true! Is she delusional or in denial or both? She also had led me to believe that I WAS one of her "Real" friends. Ouch!
Anyway, I'm not sure how a tabloid knew all of this and she didn't. I'm sure she must have had a clue at that time, but whatever... It doesn't matter now I guess. According to Teresa, I'm supposed to know when she isn't lying. Since when? Her track record isn't the greatest. The whole thing is ludicrous. Oh...and yes, I get snarky when I'm angry. Who doesn't? Don't lie, you all live for those moments while watching reality shows. Why? Because you can relate, so don't act like you give compliments out when you're angry. I'm not buying it. (I still love you.)
I guess I hit a nerve with Teresa when I called her out, because that is when Teresa wanted to "run away."
When I said she was blaming everyone for her going away, I was talking about what I had seen and heard on Watch What Happens Live when Joe Giudice (Teresa's voice) blamed Joe Gorga for his sister being in jail, and she had also blamed Melissa for coming on the show and talking bad about her, which she believed painted a bad picture of her that swayed the judge's opinion of her which helped put her in jail. And if you haven't heard the latest news, she is also now blaming her attorney for handling her case wrong, which she believes put her in jail. That's all I meant by that. So much for her accountability speech that her attorney read to the public before going into jail (eye roll). I just wanted Teresa to take some accountability for once. For SOMEthing. For ANYthing. Unfortunately, I had not felt that prison changed her. This was upsetting and disappointing to me.
And with that...Teresa and Joe left, but not before Joe left us some wine and some fabulous prosciutto! The end! Stay tuned to see what happens next. It might surprise you."
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