This week we have #BookGate I know that it's a fight between Carole and Aviva. Let's get right into the episode shall we? Carole and Aviva meet for lunch because Aviva wants Carole to help with her book. Aviva, girl if you have fifteen really hot men in your apartment, send them this way!! I have to admit Carole, Aviva is weird, but it's more than that. She is nuts on tree. Holy ish Aviva pulled out almost the same glasses that Carole owns, and she states 'I single white femaled you.' I knew she lost her leg, but this crazy lady has lost her mind! Fucking insane!
Carole doesn't think that imitation is the highest form of flattery... flattery is. Aviva is as creepy as Woody Allen. I love that Carole says she writes 'Lyrical' because in all honesty that is how I write. I started with poetry. So while my writing may not be grammatically correct, it's beautiful. Okay so maybe not beautiful... sure is funny. Aviva who are you kidding?? You putting out a book? I'm sorry but the only people reading it are going to be amputees. This bitch just said it's kind of like e-mailing, writing a book, Carole's face says it all WTF is she talking about? I don't get it either Carole.
I totally feel Carole on this, writing is a process and a love! To undermine that is wrong, if I was across the table from Aviva I would have laughed in her face, and said 'Aviva, sweetie go write an e-mail because you ARE NOT, and, will never be a WRITER! No matter how many long e-mails you put out.' Aviva, and her conceding tone need to stop, because that was a letter to your mom not a book. Aviva is trying to insinuate that Carole used a ghost writer. Girl BYE!
Just when I say bye to Aviva she shows up at a wine store to meet Ramona. Aviva, in the ugly brown pant suit... please send it back to the seventies where it belongs. It makes me think your about to break out in a grease musical number, please don't. Ramona is not ready to be friendly to Aviva, and I totally get that. Now Ramona wants her to look around the room, and tell her what she sees. Rose' is displayed because it is what is popular. Aviva picks up a wine called bitch wine, and that wine wasn't even in the display. Where did it come from? and Aviva, bitch... wine is a Granche. NOT A ROSE'. I really think the producers are trying to make her likeable. NEWS FLASH! #NotGoingToHappen
I have to say I like Ramona some times, she'd cooky AND fun. I don't know how long this friendship with Aviva will last. So Aviva mentions that everyone is coming to her housewarming party but she fails to mention it to my girl Heather?? I see how it is. Aviva is telling Ramona about the lunch she had with Carole and labeled it disturbing. Hey Aviva, the only thing that seemed disturbing at that lunch WAS YOU!
Carole meets with Kristen and Heather #HOLLA! So far I like all these women, Heather has an awesome attitude and seems super fun to be around. Kristen is stunning, and has hilarity flowing from her pores. Carole gets out of the car dressed to impress. I like how Heather looks amazing in a t-shirt and bad ass black shorts. While Kristen is in a killer all black workout ensemble, I love how Kristen says that her and Carole equal #TrueLove. Carole is explaining to the girls about her lunch with Aviva. She says in the two years she's known Aviva. Aviva, never once expressed she wanted to write a book. That's because she didn't want to write until an agent, most likely said, housewives are having great success writing, let's get you a book deal.
Aviva is totally misconstruing the story to Ramona, you felt one upped. Honey from what I saw you should apologize to Carole, but please continue to talk mess. SHE is the writer. Aviva tells Ramona that her publishing house told her Carole had a ghost writer. I'm sorry, but #BookGate is already exhausting because of Aviva's whiney voice. Cut back to Carole, Heather, and Kristen. Heather says it best: Aviva was Carole's biggest fan. Aviva knows Carole wrote the book. 'She was on Oprah for God's Sake.' HOLLA! Kristen like's Aviva, so she doesn't want to hear it. I don't blame her, but wait till she gets to know Aviva. Seriously it's so damn obvious Aviva wants to be Carole.
Kristen thinks she's the most amazing mother ever, she cracks me up. Kristen invites Heather’s family over to her apartment, I have to say all the kids are so cute, and Cash Money is hilarious. Heather loves Kristen and Josh as a couple as do I already. They seem like really good patents. Kinsley isn't walking at seventeen months so they are putting braces on her legs to help her walk. Heather opens up to Kristen want her son Jax went through was very difficult, and I think it's awesome that Donald saved Jax. I'm an organ donor, and I'm very happy everything worked out for Jax. Lots of days to smile now!
Aviva has moved in, and her son's room is pretty bad ass. Harry is there, and he invited Sonja to dinner. I can't believe at some of the things Aviva says. She is like trying to get Harry to put a ring on it. Then she says 'aren't y'all fuck buddies?' OMG she's actually pretty hilarious sometimes! Sonja bitches!! She's inviting Kristen over for a spray tan. Sonja said she is a little nervous about Kristen because she's a Ford model. Sonja please get over your insecurities, it doesn't look good on you. Kristen says 'Sonja has a spray tan come to her, OF COURSE SHE DOES!' As Kristen is stripping for her spray tan, Sonja is like checking her out, her ass that is. Then, Sonja notices a tattoo on Kristen's back. 'You had me fooled' says Sonja. What does that even mean Sonja?? Sonja is checking out every inch of Kristen I get it, but it's freaking weird. Then they begin to talk about #BookGate, Sonja is obviously on Aviva's side. Sonja WTF is your problem with Carole?? I'd like to know.
Kristen is awesome I've got to say. #RideOrDie for your bitches girl! Aviva is meeting Heather to invite her to the housewarming party. Heather has such class, and I live for her fashion sense, get it! Heather is very protective of her friends, and she wants to find out exactly what Aviva's book is about. Aviva says her book is 'to share a story.' Really Aviva, you don't know the story you’re sharing? Heather asks her who her target audience is, and Aviva says 'I don't know' REALLY AVIVA? You obviously have everyone else doing the work, and you are just along for the one legged ride. Heather says 'this conversation is like circling the drain, send me down the shoot already. I can't take it anymore.' Who can ughhhhh. Aviva, Heather was just trying to help, if you can't see that you are dimmer than most my costumers at work. #JustSaying. Heather straight up says - you have to spend a lot of time with your ghost writer. Literally I'm DEAD.
Heather is going in for the kill people. Aviva says ' You can't use a ghost writer for a memoir' Heather says, 'Sure you can.' Hillary Clinton used a ghost writer Aviva. You think one person will say she didn't write her book? Hell to the no, Heather just proved my point baby. Rock N’ Roll memoirs are her favorites, and all of them are ghost written. Aviva says it takes a village to write a book. Then Miss Socio says to Heather that Carole used a ghost writer, not the best bottle of Rose' on the shelf are you Aviva?
Sonja and Harry are on a date. OMG Sonja you can't even keep your guys straight. Sonja how much work opportunities do you really have going on, because damn. All that adderall is why you can't finish a damn project. She invites Harry inside, as this is happening, she says 'oh Harry' can we please change the candy 'Oh Henry' to 'Oh Harry' or at least start a petition?
Sonja is freaking sharpeing a Chanel bag, please stop. Aviva’s housewarming party is about to start, and the elevator is broken. Aviva claims she hopes this isn't a sign of what the night holds. I say, your apartment building is probably fucking haunted. It's NYC after all, or you know it could be Karma. Sonja has come in like a boss, Ramona is working a bad ass dress. All that pink, with some purple and black yass doing it for the Gods honey. Love me some purple, but Aviva those salmon colored pants give you a camel toe. I guess fish, knows fish. So Sonja, Harry, Aviva, Reed, and Ramona are all in Aviva's bed room. Is an orgy about to happen? I know Ramona isn't down, but Sonja, and Harry are for sure! Aviva and Reed I could see them going in for the kill as well. Harry is a freak. Ramona called the whole thing strange. All in agreement?
Carole and Heather have arrived. Heather looks amazing she definitely wins best dressed. It's amazing. Carole is on top her game with #BookGate. Aviva, Ramona, and Kristen are having a conversation about #GhostWriterBookGate, Kristen says she's 100% positive that Carole wrote her book. Ramona says, 'Just because her name is the only one on the book doesn't mean she didn't have a ghost writer. That’s why the are called Ghost writer's' Ramona, why are trying to downplay Carole? Aviva wants to say don't put your money on it, Kristen I applaud you, because Aviva is in the wrong everyone knows it. Well, everyone except these two crazy ladies.
Heather tells Carole about her lunch with Aviva. Now Ramona comes over and stirring the pot, just like a witch stirs a cauldron. She eventually gets Carole to go confront Aviva. Carole comes in for the kill, she says that Aviva comparing her career to her own is like comparing 'Apples and Space Ships' Aviva says word on the street is that Carole used s ghost writer. Aviva AKA Miss Camel Toe, you are never on the streets. Carole says 'AVIVA YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU ARE TAKING ABOUT!' But doesn't she? Hmmmm... No she doesn't. Aviva goes on to say that her publishing house passed on Carole's book. Don't make me laugh. Still more lies. Sonja's comic relief is great for this moment! Aviva asks Carole if she thinks she is John Grisham, then Carole says ' Who are you?' Aviva says 'A girl trying to write a book.' Carole calls Aviva a liar and phony' you left out a few skittles short of the rainbow. Love it! Carole says 'we've all heard that before maybe Kelly Bensimon is you're ghost writer'. Make sure to tune in next week to @BravoTV at 8:00ct/9:00et, and of course this crazy bitch will be back next week as well!
Watch the full #BookGate episode of RHONY Season 6, Episode 2
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